Trust is the foundation for every relationship. Our relationships with our family members, those we minister with, those we minister to, and those we would seek to share the gospel with all depend on the trust we build in each specific relationship.
In his most recent book entitled Trust, Dr Henry Cloud states that “Trust is the fuel for all of life. We are wired biologically, neurologically, emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically to trust. Trust is the currency that drives every relationship.” Dr. Cloud identifies that being understood as the critical first step in building trust. (If you’d like to hear a bit on this from Dr Cloud, check out 08:57-17:54 on this video.)
Asking good questions (and listening well) builds trust.
God’s word gives counsel to the benefit of asking good questions and listening well. It is the fool who “takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion” (Proverbs 18:2), and thus “gives an answer before he hears” (Proverbs 18:13). “The purpose in a man’s heart is like deep water,” says Proverbs 20:5, “but a man of understanding will draw it out.”
Here are just three ways that asking good questions builds trust:
- It shows that you are interested in the other person. When you ask someone a question, it shows that you are paying attention to them and that you value their thoughts and opinions. This can make the other person feel valued and respected, which can lead to trust.
- It builds rapport.When you ask someone a question, it creates a sense of connection between you and the other person. This is because you are both engaged in a shared activity and you are both working towards a common goal (i.e., to learn more about each other). This sense of connection can help to build trust.
- It helps you to understand the other person better. When you ask someone a question, you are essentially asking them to share their knowledge, experience, feelings, and thoughts with you. This can help you to better understand their perspective and their point of view, which can lead to a more trusting relationship.
/// NEW DATE /// Our online CMN gatherings are moving to the 4th Tuesday of the Month!
Please join us for our next Church Multiplication Network online gathering as we consider and learn together about Building Trust using the Power of Good Questions.
Please join us at 3pm (Frankfurt) 8am (Panama), Tuesday the 26th of September.
Your Church Multiplication Leadership Team looks forward to seeing you!